Show Summary

In this episode, we are dig into Emotional Labor, a major issue that impacts our relationships at home and work in deep, unexpected ways. This is a complex topic, often weighed down by years of bad habits, gender equality issues, and uninvestigated family of origin issues. The only way through is to talk it out, so we get the conversation going with many tears and lots of kindness.

The Video that Shows the Problem


Show Transcript

Download the transcript here. Thanks to listener-volunteer Siobhan!


Posted by Leslie Camacho


  1. Heh.

    When I first started therapy, your Nenek called me on the phone to encourage me to ignore any feelings of disloyalty I might have if I were tempted to criticize her personally, or anything that went on at home while I was growing up (or later, for that matter). She said that all decent therapists understand that a child’s view of what’s happening is THEIR experience, and may not represent the reality at all in some cases, or very closely in many others. But THEIR view is what has to be dealt with, and so she said “Be honest – regardless.”

    So, I’m fine with your recollections, love…..knowing that a lot of your parents’ relations had been negotiated before you were ever born, so OF COURSE you didn’t see them! We also didn’t parade a bunch of stuff in front of you guys, because we’d seen a bit more of that than we liked as WE were growing up. I doubt we hit the perfect balance in any of this, of course.

    Do you remember us telling you that while we were quite sure we were making some mistakes as we raised you, we were doing the best we could at the time, and any inadvertent errors and the subsequent problems they caused you could be dealt with in therapy? I don’t know that you had a clue, but we said that more than once!!


    Love to you both — you are doing such a GREAT job!!

    And I can hardly wait to hear your adult children’s view of all this!




    1. Our kids will say we raised them perfectly in all ways…. 🙂


      1. Of COURSE they will — as did most of us!

        Just that when the rubber really meets the road, they’ll have to revisit and re-examine……as YOU have shown them!



    1. Thanks Molly! Anything in particular stand out?


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